Love yourself

Always love yourself more than love others.

Walk on

Its sad to hear the inevitable,
but at least I can put myself to ease now.
I would be lying if I'd say that this whole thing didn't affect me a bit,
but I'll get over with it soon.
My heart bleeds profusely like rain pouring from the skies,
and although this piece of glass has shattered,
I know this is part of life.
I just wish you happiness, and as for me,
I'll have to walk on.
May fate lead me to the promised land.
One less problem is not a bad thing after all...


Met up with the HNF girls for dinner and chit-chat and I became honorary member of the sisterhood for that day. Geez. What a name. Haha anyway it was nice catching up with them, especially Xiuzhen and Wanwen, and got to know like what they have been doing and stuffs. Wanwen still as "mature" as ever, haha she displayed some of her very "cool" kickboxing moves she learned to me haha. But the highlight was the place we went for dessert. It was this place near Shaw Centre, this fruity place whose shop was painted mostly yellow, and it is famous for its mango delicacies. Their desserts were very good indeed. I had this Aloe Vera jelly mixed with mango and coconut juice complemented with mango cubes. How about that. Very nice. Haha. But I loved Wanwen's red bean paste with mango and sago even more. The next time I m going there I swear I am gonna have that. Haha. They are all going into university soon and goin to experience a great campus life(I assume)...meaning I get to meet up with them less often. Just hoping WW and Fel will give me their tutees to take over since they will stop their tutoring services very very soon. I so so need to do tuition coz I need the fucking money for my driving lessons. Haha. Anyone who has recommendations are always welcome to contact me. Hehe.

PPC is this saturday and I m seriously quite looking forward to it. Miss the days where we played floorball together and I was the guradian trying to keep out all the shots at goal. Floorball is becoming one of my favourite sports and I might consider joining floorball in university next time haha. Anw PPC better turn out to be good bcos I am going. Bleah.

Oh, thank you Charlene. Without you my 1000-piece puzzle will still be rotting at home. Thanks girl! =)

And screw the stupid mosquito who tried to bite me. Yeah fuck you man I got 2 bites for nothing. You DESERVED to DIE. But I am quite worried coz it looks like an Aedes mosquito as it had black and white striped legs.
Hopefully nothing happens. Tell me mosquito, you didn't bite an infected person did you?

The main objective of terrorism

Came into the office this morning only to find out that there were two bombs that exploded at a marketplace in Sulawesi, Indonesia. Investigations have concluded that these bombings were likely to have been the work of terrorists. I got to see the news footages, and my heart goes out to those who have perished from the bomb attacks and also to those who have lost their loved ones. Saw this infant with blood pouring all over his face and I just can't help but feel so sorry for him. Why has terrorism been on the rise recently? Can anyone explain what terrorists aim to achieve from all these bombings? Although innocent lives are continuously being lost, the terrorists just don't fucking seem to get it. Have they achieved their so-called "aim"? Do terrorists even know what they hope to achieve from instilling fear in people? I mean..so what? Ok, you win, you bombed the damn place and what message are you trying to send? I am so curious to know..

So let me guess..they carry out acts of terrorism hoping to make people afraid of them so they can back down. I would love to see the day where terrorists eventually win the battle (Well I have 99.999% confidence that won't happen, so don't think I m pro-terrorism). With so many nations trying to gun down Osama, Zarqawi and whoever is the leader, I just can't see how terrorists are going to achieve their objective. Its just so sad to find out that these people have black hearts, to even proclaim that the loss of lives is inevitable for the greater good to be achieved. What is the greater good? Shame on you people. Terrorist is never anything good, furthermore if what you are trying to achieve involves killing innocent parties. Condemn terrorism. My heart truly goes out to those who have been affected from the doings of terrorists and hope that this fight against terrorism ends soon. Can you ever imagine you are someone living in Iraq or whatever? Its easier to get killed than to survive.

So, terrorists. Think again. Do you know your objective?

Ryoko

Just so pretty... :)

Fattyworld

No inspiration.

Stayed home all day. Feel so lazy. I just can't get myself to head down to the gym I dunno why.

But all I know is if I continue to slack like that and eat eat eat without exercise it is gonna land me in fattyworld. I'm 67kg now. Its freakin heavy to me. I dun like that number.

I DON'T WANT TO BE A FAT-ASS!!!! =(

Suddenly craving for beer. Anyone for beer drinking? Think I need to chill out soon man..

Decision time

I guess after all...its best to go with what my heart feels.

It has been really tough deciding on what course I really should pursue in university but after much much consideration, a good talk with a few friends and relatives, I guess I'm going to appeal to change course. I'm not even sure if I will like studying electrical engineering. Its pretty technical and I might not like the idea of dealing with circuits and transistors. Perhaps something like biz ad will suit me better? Well definitely my interest in business is there, so why not pursue business? I'll probably like working in the financial sector more than doing technical stuff I guess..

Seniors are always telling me to go with what I'm most interested in, the most comforting comment that I have received was...

"Go with what you feel is best for you, because if you are really interested in that field, you will be successful no matter what."

I've discussed it with mummy already, she says she fully supportive of whatever decision I will make. Guess I will continue to heed advice from different people. I would really like to express my thanks to everyone who gave me so good advice....without you people I might have rashly accepted something without really thinking it through properly. The appeal window is only going to open on 1st June. At the moment I will just accept EE so that I am at least guaranteed a spot in NUS.

Liverpool FC - Kings of Europe

Liverpool are the Kings of Europe once more!! Totally unbelievable...what tremendous spirit shown by all of the players to come back from 3-0 down at half time to clinch the match by penalties. As a Liverpool fan, I seriously can't believe it myself. This certainly has to be the most amazing, exciting final I have watched in my life. Seeing Gerrard lift the Champion's trophy really made me feel so happy.. I'm sure everyone who is related to Liverpool would have felt ecstatic. 3 hours of exhilarating action and everyone played their hearts out. Special mention to Gerrard who led the comeback, and also Didi and Carra for being rock in defence, but of course the man who single-handedly got Liverpool the trophy - Jerzy Dudek. What a way to hit out at your critics with such an outstanding display...how in the hell did he keep out Shevchenko's shot and follow up in the last few minutes?? Anyway, everyone is talking about this great triumph and now I just hope the UEFA executive committee will allow Liverpool to participate in next year's competition on the basis that we are defending champions.

How can Gerrard leave the club when he gets to experience nights like this? :)

The moment everyone related to Liverpool have been waiting for


Dudek's cup-winning save - The man of the match


Winners for the night


Stevie G and the trophy



ONCE A RED, ALWAYS A RED
+++ YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE +++

Oh and I met Jacq at the Ubi driving centre just this afternoon when I was on my way to camp. Been long since I last saw her, probably that night at Zouk(that Uberture thingy) December last year..haha shez still as pretty as ever(=p). She told me she just finished her driving lesson when I met her. Perhaps I was too surprised or wad but I really din expect to see her there and so we din really talk much..She just asked where I was heading and stuffs, and yah. Maybe should have asked her how she has been these few months, and where she was going to study and sorts...Tongue-tied I guess..really so surprised to see her. Well anyway at least I saw her, maybe we might just chance upon each other againz haha. =) As far as I know, shez still the same old Jacq, speaking so softly just like Anthea haha..

It's a small small world.

Go Go Liverpool

Just can't freaking wait for the Champion's League Final tonight. Hopefully I can post a pic of Stevie G lifting the trophy in my next entry. Haha.

A transistor says it all

Being in the army makes me feel increasingly stupid.

Yeah. A perfect example was on Saturday. Went for the NUS talk, and they were talking about transistors..I remember studying that in JC physics...now I don't even have the slightest idea wad a transistor is. How stewpid.

Now can anyone tell me the function of a transistor?

Am I really going to study electrical engineering? Have I made a right choice? I am always saying that I want to use the expertise that I will get from EE to venture into the business society, but is that really possible? No one knows wad will happen in the future anyway, right? Will job prospects be good? We won't know will we?Everything might change. But one thing I am sure of. I am interested in business...but the thing that is keeping me away from studying business in a university is that its totally a waste of time eh? Business degree is easily attainable everywhere I presume..and to do business do you really need a business degree? Some business knowledge will do I suppose? I don't know.

Just hoping my plans will come true in future. Get a EE deg and jump into the business market. Technopreneurship. Yes. That is the word.

But come to think of it, why am I so worried? Or rather bothered about what lies ahead in my life? People always say "Let nature take its course"....maybe I shouldn't be thinking things too much ya..

I just learnt what Murphy's law is about today.

The weekend at a glance

SATURDAY
In the afternoon I went to NUS which was bloody far to attend some talk concerning electrical engineering so that I could know about the course better. Met Yvonne at Clementi coz she was also gong for a talk, her talk was Materials engineering though, but at least she made sure I didn't get lost in the huge NUS campus haha. Well, the talk was useful i guess. It made my doubts about engineering disappear and showed me about the various areas that I could venture into with a BEng(EE) Degree. Got free lunch too. Wasn't that great for lunch but still...its free.Heh. Then I headed down to bloody Jurong to replace my Zen Micro with a new one, since it was spoiled and its still under warranty. Well at least I got a brand new one..but the catch was that my songs were gone. All gone. I only have like half of my database left in the computer. Some songs that I really liked...they were gone...:(

Met sis and Grace at Marche for dinner..had my usual Rosti and Soft Shell Crab, and also stole some Erdinger from Nick. The beer tasted great, it was like tonnes betta than Tiger oh my god. Can't wait to go taste other beers like Kilkenny and others..coz Nick was like telling how nice it is and everything..I think I m seriously considering taking beer drinking up as a hobby haha! Well I m glad Grace seems fine now...shez slowly gettin over it..Then headed down to Geylang over to Meng Siong's house to watch the FA Cup Final..haha Arsenal won!! Screw MAN UTD!!! haha u deserved it..Meng Siong's house was very nice..very spacious n everything..met old acquaintances like Jason, Tze Hin, JunRong, Yi En and many more. More army talk which I din get but its ok...I like my vocation now so it doesn't matter...And after that guess what..Me Ken Tze Hin and Russ..we all went car sightseeing at the Waterside basement carpark. Sounds stupid rite. Haha but it was great seeing all the BMWs, Volkswagens, Prado, Coopers, Jaguar...etc. Man. My dream car will be a BMW. Yeah. Dream car. So I can just dream on... I will never get that sort of money unless I m truly some successful freak in my career haha. Oh thank you Ken AGAIN for fetching me home.

SUNDAY
Wahsun should be on the airplane to Australia now. Good luck on his future endeavours...hez migrating to Australia for good...Met him to see him off for one last time. Also met the HNF people and I only knew today that Xiuzhen and Wanwen were going to study TCM. Wads the trend with this TCM(Traditional Chinese Medicine) nowadays? Well..sure can't imagine them being Chinese Physicians and helping people feel pulses haha.

Watched Amityville Horror. Great show to watch if you want to get yourself frightened. Although I wasn't really freaked out but I m impressed by the horror scenes in the show. Rate it 3.5 stars.

3.15am.


Arsenal, be proud of yourselves. Although I am not an Arsenal fan, I felt u deserved this more than Man Utd. =)

Fuck

I don't care, I will just say it.

Am I that damn unlucky today or what. Even my Zen Micro is not responding. It just went blank after I accidently dropped it. Its my first time that i have dropped this priceless asset of mine and now I can't even switch it on. So what people say about Creative is actually true? That their technology is fuckin lousy?

I am going to take out the battery and put it back when I wake up tomorrow. Please let it work again.I can't live without it, especially after I spent so much time putting songs inside the player.

I really hope I don't need to give myself more trouble to send it down for repair and waste more $.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH . . . . .

Just venting my frustrations

I hate uniform checks. SAF no.3 uniform checks. Don't ask me why. Can't be bothered to blog today.

Can someone tell me what's wrong with my computer?

Had a very very bad cough yesterday so the first thing I did when I went to work yesterday was to report sick. My initial intention was just to get some free cough syrup from the medical center but never did I expect myself to be back at home that morning by 10am. The very kind medical officer gave me an MC so I got the day off haha. Hmm..actually I thought it was just a real bad cough, but when I measured my temperature, the thermometer read 38.1 degrees I think, at that moment, I thought like wow even god is helping me...free from work today haha. And then that was how I got my MC. So thank you to the kind yound medical offcer who diagnosed me as unfit for yesterday. Wonder if all medical officers there are like that. Abit sick then can get MC already. Heh. I won't know too soon coz I need to fall sick to return to that center for another checkup again haha. But one thing about that medical center was that the place really smelt like medicine. Wonder how the people working there take the smell. I mean, the smell of the air there was almost the same as the smell of hospital wards and it seriously made me feel uncomfortable. Even if you weren't sick and you dropped by that place, you will probably have felt like puking haha. But in all, thank you to that MO. heh.


I miss her. I really do.


I don't know why, but my computer kept crashing yesterday! Hopefully therez nothing wrong wif it man, its barely 3 months since I last repaired it. And when the guy did the diagnosis he couldn't find anything wrong with the hardware. So shouldn't be any problem wad..But I don't understand why the BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH KEEPS APPEARING!!! It shows up promptly and the com reboots. Well done. I seriously have NO FUCKING IDEA what the hell is fucking wrong with this fucking com. (Forgive me I am getting a bit agitated here). Issit because of Bitcomet? Coz apparently I am downloading music...perhaps it is from an infected/error source. This better be the case. Now poor me is using the SAF com to do some blogging. Wanted to put this entry yesterday but the stoopid com crashed on me. Please I dun wan to head down to Sim Lim again carrying this damn heavy CPU. hmph. Hopefully today when I head back and try again nothing will happen. PRAY.

What is my problem with Sengkang?

How stupid can I get. Got a call from some tuition agency yesterday and there was a job offer for me but I dunno what the hell I was thinking, so when I heard the location was at Sengkang, I thought it was too blardy far for me to accept the offer. Hence, I told the woman on the phone that I didn't want it. Fuck man. Wasted. After that my mum asked who called and I told her. She said I was fucking dumb which I totally agreed. After all I realised Sengkang wasn't too far and not too inaccessible as there were bus services linking Sengkang to both Paya Lebar(my camp) and Pasir Ris(my home, of course). I should have told the woman I would like to consider for a few days first. Oh man I am a fucking dumbass. Such calls only come once in a blue moon...and I squandered this chance totally. I have only myself to blame I guess.

Actually i wanted to call back to say I will take the job but..it was a damn private number. Regretted. Can only hope that I get such calls more often in future. I will definitely be not so rash in my decision next time. Stupid me. Stupid Stupid Clement.

Leon you are some crappy shit

Lamuda was back in Singapore for the weekend and I met up with him along with the rest yesterday in town. After a very long time Leon decided that we should head to Mcdonalds@Centrepoint coz he missed eating fast food. Over dere we sat, ate, talked cock and even played cards. I was like talking cock with him for most of the time. I dunno, but he thinks I am real funny and I tot he was real crappy too. The whole time we were like in our own world, and Chloe was just laughing non-stop haha. Then Leon suggested playing cards. He was really crap coz he suggested that the loser kissed my hands. Okay so Chloe lost. Leon, Nigel and Jong decided to make it double or nothing. But Chloe lost again. At that moment I thought...DIE.. so embarassing. Of coz I didn't want to offer my hand, Chloe too refused and at long last nothing happened. But the next round Hwi Jong lost. He kissed my hand. Nvm I thought, I should be sporting. Then the next round the loser had to kiss my neck. So Leon lost and he eagerly kissed my neck. Leon, you are a piece of crap!!haha I felt violated lor...haha.

Put this aside, it was great to see Lamuda again. And yesterday I got to know that Meiqi will most likely be going overseas coz shez got SPF scholarship. Together with Kiaying and Rong they will be going HK in July and they asked me if I wanted to come. Of coz I wanted to tag along but to go HK as the only guy was quite funny coz they will be shopping for their women's stuff and besides hotel rooms will be a problem too. What a waste. I guess we can all go together when the other guyz are free to go overseas too. It will be great if that can happen. Becks and Lamuda just got their wisdom teeth extracted, Lamuda more recently so he could not intake solid food. Becky sure knows how to dress up now..have to say that shez looking more elegant and also getting prettier! Haha..can't believe I am giving her such a compliment. Well I did not get to see Rong, Russel and Janice coz they didn't come down to meet us. OH I got to see Jong's baldy head for the first time..and OMG its so fuckin funny. Really too bad i forgot to take a picture of it if not I will DEFINITELY post it here whaha.

West Brom has just survived premiership relegation! Incredible scenes at the Hawthorns the fans are down at the pitch celebrating with the players..haha what a wonderful achievement for them..

Anyway. Look forward to the next meeting with you guys and girls again..it was great fun yesterday..I gave Kiaying my umbrella so that she could be safe from the thunder on her way home. In the end I had to run about 200 metres under the intimidating sky from the bus stop to my home hahas. Managed to escape unharmed thankfully. Wad a close shave. At one moment I thought I was going to get struck down by lightning. Stupid me. Bleah.

Boring

I can't believe it. Woking on a Saturday totally pisses me off. 12 straight hours of stoning in the office! Well apparently i had no choice but to serve duty today coz my department is a skeleton squad now. Calvin and Jiahao left for Tioman yesterday, Daniel is on leave for his exams, Harvey unavailable because of his wadever shit project he has to do for the SAF...which leaves us with only 5 pathetic idiots to do duty. It sucks totally coz I am wasting one day of my life thanks to blardy SAF. And my work is doubled today bcoz..

Of all days.

Endure....is all I can do for now. 2 more hours. And Sanjay, please stop whining I know its freaking boring but whining won't solve your problem haha. Chill man dude.

Independence day

Just wondering. When can I truly declare myself to be independent and be able to take care of myself, settle my own needs and be able to live out the rest of my life independently? Coz i was thinking back and hey...most of the time my mother helps me out with my laundry...sometimes she helps me clean my room...iron my clothes. She even has to call me up for work EVERYDAY...Die lah...this can't go on..I can't depend too much on her rite..So I am slowly trying to do everything myself. First I start by cooking my own meals. So she doesn't have to worry what I'd eat for dinner the whole time. Learning from my sister some pasta cooking will sound fine but shez always complaining about how busy she is and..ah wadever. Should also force myself to wake up myself. But I m a hell of of heavy sleeper. so I dunno how I can go about doing that. Cleaning my own room occasionally shouldn't be much of a problem too. My dirty clothes? eh...that should wait..do other minor stuff first. If I can even do cleaning, cooking and waking myself up on a regular basis, I'd be damn proud of myself already. I look forward that that day. Independence day. Where I can truly declare myself that I can support myself. I need to. If not I will go nowhere in life. I must start rite now. Today. Heh.

Anyway just had yummy Macpherson's wanton mee in office for breakfast today. It was delicious to the max..omg the char siew was so fresh and the wantons were great to chew on. Thanks Alex.

Are some parents driving their kids crazy?

Parents are actually getting stricter with their kids nowadays. They are getting fiercer and more demanding. Well, just found out yesterday morning. The thought of another mundane day of travelling to work early morning was sickening, but as i sat at one corner in the MRT train listening to my precious zen micro mp3, there was this 40+ year old(at least she looks like that to me) woman holding her kid who was like 4 years old?(well just a guess) who came over to take the 2 empty seats next to me. Then, slowly she sunk her hand into this big big bag and took out a Chinese revision book and a piece of paper. She gave the piece of paper to her son and started a spelling test on him. Actually she was talkin quite loudly so I could hear every word that was coming out of her mouth. I was like...HUH?...spelling test???ON THE TRAIN??wow..hez actually kinda poor thing..is the mum desperate for some excellent results or wad. do a pre-spelling test ON THE TRAIN? heh. well i couldn't be bothered so I put my headphones back onto my ears.

What came along afterwards was actually quite shocking. Every Chinese character the mum pronounced, and whenever the son could not write, the mum would just beat him on the lap and start ranting at this poor little kid. its kinda humiliating rite, on a MRT train with so many people somemore. If I were the kid I will just have felt utterly embarassed.

I feel that kids nowadays face tremendous pressure to do well in their studies. Next time if i become a parent, I will try my absolute best not to pressurize my kids. I want to give them the best. I mean...if my kids aren't study material, then so be it. Why force them to study so hard till they burst their brains? Every kid ought to be useful so people should just work on what the kids enjoy doing and nurture their talents.

Parents. You should learn to understand your children betta. Understand what they really want in life.

Well. I strongly emphasize that this is a very one-sided view. I dunno how parents do actually feel about such situations, and I understand that this is just my personal opinion, so I know I am in no position to comment coz I am not yet a parent myself. =)

Problems

Problems. Everyone has problems. I am sure nobody likes to have problems. So it will be hell great if problems didn't exist in this world at all. Am I right to say that life is unfair because some people face greater and more serious problems than others? First confession to clemcube: I have alot of problems. But i ain't goin to list down all these problems here if not its really going to get kinda personal, especially if YOU, yes YOU, whom i might not know well, chances upon this blog and reads this entry. But believe me I seriously am facing lots of problems. Not only now, but I am also even thinking of the future. Are these problems goin to fade away in the later years of my life? Then i think again. What would other people do if they were in my situation. And would i be happier to be in other people's situation? even if they had their problems. sometimes i tell myself. i really wished i were other people. let others be me. then i would like to ask them how it feels to be me. but its REALITY. No one understands me. Only maybe my sister.coz she knows it too.

Then yesterday i was watching the 7pm show on Channel 8. The one with A-Wang. I like the show alot! Then i watched Golden Faith on Channel U. Saw the adorable Yinyin and the ever-so-independent A-Jia again. Sometimes, I really wish i could be them. Naive, jovial wadever. But no problems. Nothing to worry about. They are like in a world of their own...I rather be like them. Adidas said: "IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING"... Yeah rite.

I might feel that my problems are rather severe, but still i reckon there are many more people out dere who are worst off than me. hopefully this entry will give u a penny for your thoughts.

A new beginning

Well, it all starts again. I feel its pretty unfair if i do not visit my blog on a regular basis. It seems like i have abandoned it or something. It has been a long 3 months since I last visited my cosy clemcube. I promise, I'd try to make an effort to visit this place more often from now on..after all, its a place where i can scribble my thoughts with ease. =)

So...the first step to starting afresh. hehe. erase previous posts(actually there were only a pathetic 3 of them) and start anew!